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Aug. 5th, 2005 10:09 pmJanell and the boys are here for the weekend. They are freaks. They seem to really like the 85 degree third floor of this house. The boys are nutty after a long busy day of running around playing and meeting new people. They have been sent upstairs to watch The Borrowers. I sent Janell into enforced relaxation. Drew a bath for her and put bubbles in it, then lit a bunch of candles and turned off the lights and told her to let it go.
I feel really bad about not being there for her during this pregnancy. She's never had "her" guy there to go to her dr. visits and see the sonograms. It was always me. When she had to have an emergency abortion because of all the meds she was on fucked up the fetus, I walked her in, I held her hand through it all. Now she's going through all of that without anyone to go with her. I feel terrible. I know there are people who would go with her. If she wanted someone, all she would need to do is ask. But there is something to be said for the kind of friend that is there without having to be asked. I miss that a lot.
I suppose that's what I mean when I say I miss having a girlfriend. Someone who won't look at me weird for me asking if they will color my hair. Someone I won't feel weird asking to color my hair. I miss my girlfriends. I miss being not the girliest one around. I miss the Manorites (Mike can usually be a better girl than the females there anyway).
I feel really bad about not being there for her during this pregnancy. She's never had "her" guy there to go to her dr. visits and see the sonograms. It was always me. When she had to have an emergency abortion because of all the meds she was on fucked up the fetus, I walked her in, I held her hand through it all. Now she's going through all of that without anyone to go with her. I feel terrible. I know there are people who would go with her. If she wanted someone, all she would need to do is ask. But there is something to be said for the kind of friend that is there without having to be asked. I miss that a lot.
I suppose that's what I mean when I say I miss having a girlfriend. Someone who won't look at me weird for me asking if they will color my hair. Someone I won't feel weird asking to color my hair. I miss my girlfriends. I miss being not the girliest one around. I miss the Manorites (Mike can usually be a better girl than the females there anyway).
