hypatia42: (Default)
2013-01-16 06:39 pm
Entry tags:

false advertising, NRE, winter

I was recently introduced to the idea that push up bras are false advertising. For some reason its stuck in my head. I keep coming back to it. Maybe its because of the idea that I am inherently advertising anything. Or maybe its the thought that my comfort is something to be scrutinized by someone else. I might be more sensitive about breast size conversations right now because of the size change post surgery. I know I am. I specifically bowed out of a conversation about underwear because of it. I will get over it and move on. Right now its a sore spot.

Still, push up bras simply move tissue from one place to another. They don't really add size, they change shape. No biggie right? Apparently no. Hell moving the straps on a bra to a cross in the back makes the breasts look 1-2 cup sizes larger, is that false advertising too?

I've been wearing super supportive bras since high school when I got bigger than a b cup. Wearing a bra that is supportive I rarely think about my breasts. It certainly not advertising in any way. There are shirts I own that I would say are advertising. Bras are rarely seen. I don't wear bras for anyone but me. I am certain than anyone who is allowed to interact with me would prefer I didn't wear any bra so its all for my comfort. The damn things are heavy!
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NRE is being discussed a bit more with people that I know. I suppose I have a bit of that going on myself. I really enjoy Shirtless' company. Every once in a while I stumble on a subject that reminds me I am older than he is by a fair bit and even more than his gf. 5 years I am used to, 10 or more is a little squeaky. Still, his mind is fascinating and we seem to be navigating those waters fairly well. We aren't in the same place all that often so despite living in the same state we are getting to know one another better online.
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Winter continues. I have plans at the end of Feb to go visit the sun in AZ. Trying to figure out how to manage the brain til then. I dislike feeling like my brain is a chemistry experiment but balancing all the factors is a bit like that. Vit D, sun exposure, protein, pain killers, activity, rest... Its a giant pain. Starting to understand why the snowbird phenomenon exists. Could I manage a life where 1.5-2 months of the year I was living somewhere else? Better question, would my business survive that?
hypatia42: (Fire from water)
2010-12-26 08:19 am
Entry tags:

The Longest Night

So I was sick for Yule and the day of the solstice. I didn't get up to see the sun rise. I haven't felt the wheel turning this year as I usually do. Chaos has reigned in my life. Changes thrust upon me and situations not of my choosing have occupied my mind while more than my usual amount of work has occupied my body. I didn't get to spend much time shopping for loved ones with the Honey. The time I did get I was ill and exhausted.

Yesterday EE gave birth. I wasn't there physically to help her but I was there in spirit lending my energy to her where possible. I was spent and feeling ill long about the time she was done now that I think about the time-line. The holidays in KC are always hard on us but I felt extra tired by the time I got back to the house last night. I waited and waited until I was near tears with tired because of a silly lack of communication. I did cry at the pictures of the sunrise over the ocean that were posted online.

In spite of all my tired, I lay awake all night long. My girl keeping me company. I arose in the dark, showered myself clean, and welcomed the dawn. I'm still tired. I still need rest and a break in the worst way. But I feel better. I dunno, maybe I needed my own longest night.

Ever notice how people will talk about the dark of the moon but not the dark of the year?

Fire of water, hold me in your silken embrace. Warm me and hydrate me. Help my make my own path with passion and light the way through the dark waters.

Dawn, help me give hope and reassurance to children hurt by those that should care for them. Each new day bring new life and new choices. Return them to a place where they can heal and be children again. Eternal Beloved I ask this in your name because they deserve more than the hand they have been dealt thus far. Watch over them as they relearn the way of things and move forward in life.